I have been fumbling through 2011 like a lost puppy and I have not been able to figure out why this year has been so difficult. I used to manage school, work, social life, church and working out all at the same time. Now that I am on a regular 9-5 work schedule, I can’t seem to get anything done. Yes, I had some unfortunate events early in the year, but that cannot be my crutch for ruining the rest of it.
I haven’t been able to find time to go to the gym, to do chores around the house, or to run errands. Why am I floundering? I used to be so motivated all on my own. My upcoming vacation is the only thing motivating me to work out. Yet, I couldn’t work out for the past 5 months so I’d already be at my goal weight.
Someone just floored me with the question, “What is your brand name?” I had to ask for an explanation because I knew they weren’t asking what kind of jeans I was wearing. He explained that people size us up before we ever say a word. They look at us from a 20 foot perspective (our outward appearance) and by the first 20 words we say to them (20/20). What is the image I project for others to see? Where do I want to go? What is my next step? What is my long-term goal? Does my “brand name” accurately depict what I want others to see?
The answer to all of those questions is simple: “I don’t know”. Plus, it answers why I’m struggling to find motivation. I have no direction. I have no goals. What a concept. All those years of hearing “you need to set goals” or “plan for the future” are finally making sense!
Now the problem is that I don’t know what I want out of life. When I was younger, I imagined my life differently than it is turning out. Now that I’m old(er), I need to somehow figure out where I want to go and how I want to get there.
This whole idea is just profound. I want to write more, but I have to wrap my brain around the concept and figure out what my goals are. I just love how God puts people in our lives to help us with exactly where we are. (((hugs))) to God!